Cravings

I'm craving Independence and spiritual insight and that one really divine kick that'll wake me up and get me out of this rut. I hate depending on other people to make me happy, but at the same time I crave attention and love. I want to go home, where I was so in control or at least could pretend that I was. I'm teetering on the brink of break through or breakdown. There is no subtle middle here.